Craving but not for food......

Every now and then this feeling comes. It is hard to explain. It is like having a craving for something and you don't know what it is you want to eat. But it has nothing to do with food at all. It is a very empty feeling. Deep down in your soul. Painful at times. What drives this feeling of incompleteness.

I have a very full life. Three beautiful children. A few close friends. A great although at times very dysfunctional family. But at the very core a good family. I work hard and make my money honestly. Have a home that as anyone that has a home will tell you is a work in progress. So what is the longing?

I was told tonight that I look sad. My response was that I feel distracted or maybe out of sorts is more accurate. Twice in the last two weeks I have been told I have a very depressing voice mail message. Which truth be told, I called it today and it just sounded standard. After all I do use it for business purposes so it is appropriate.

I am feeling anxious and I have not felt that in a long time. On the edge of anxiety attack? Change is in the wind and maybe it is weighing in the back of my mind. It has been an unusually busy week leading into a busy weekend.

Tale tale signs of distraction. Yesterday I fell asleep with a candle burning. Tonight I am sitting here at work and mind you it is almost midnight and the sprinkler is still running the backyard. Good thing someone is still up since I don't get off work till three in the morning.

My mind is wandering alot too. I am constantly thinking of me time, down time, calgon take me away time. Staying longer than I should in shower and late alot for my night job. Which I love it is a cake job.

The universe it telling me something and in time I am sure I will know what it is....