Men..............................

I have been separated for the last 4yrs and due to stupidity have not finished this relationship. Talk about letting something die a long tortured death! It amazes how they coming running if they think that you are gonna put them on the curb. I am not good enough to be married to and live in the same house but I am good enough to be his screw on demand. Well f**** that. I swear I hold my tongue way more than I should. I hope his dick falls off waiting for me to run over and do him. Congrats to those of you that can refrain being attracted to someone who is not available because that is my is my first adventure out to putting this tortured and slow death of relationship behind me. No wonder I have sworn off men. Believe me it is not all that deep. He (the other man) wants to know if I am falling in love with him.........please get a grip on yourself literally if you have to. It is what it is an affair that will end as quickly as it began. I have enough issues to deal with with having someone in my life full time. That is just too much I like my life with the exception of not being totally single.....but hey I consider myself single. Don't get me wrong I love men think are great but lets get real it is what is SEX.......not confused with what one calls love.

One in every family

Everyone has that one family for whatever reason just can't seem to get it together. In my family it is my sister and she drives me insane. If it is not one thing it is another, from staying with a boy (cause he ain't a man) to taking in a homeless person to live in her home with her 3 children. What on God's green earth can she be thinking. Three adults three children five cats all living in a two bedroom apartment. If it weren't for those three very beautiful children of hers I would walk away. How do you exist can't pay the rent so you live where the landlord doesn't care and utilities juggle those and if they get shut off they get shut off. I have 3 children of my own and would never live like that I work 2 jobs and do without so they can have. Does she not have a maternal instict or what the hell. Four year old eats a pop tart and his daddy has a melt down because they are his pop tarts. Oh my God who is the child now. I have my niece for two days and my sister shows up to pick her up today and I am like it there a problem that you can't call anyone. Of course the phone has been shut off. So needless to say I got to work my second job, mind you with a headache and can't imagine what the future holds for those precious children.

Time flies when your having..........

Well it has been awhile since I have visited and alot has happened summer school is over and band camp is done what a week. The person with the surprise birthday visit still ceasing to amaze me. It will be interesting to see where this all leads. He is concerned I am falling in love with him. At this point on so many levels it is not happening. Don't get me wrong he is a great guy but my head is so in a different place. I decided some time back that it is time for me. I went from living at home to living with the first husband then divorced only to be married a year later and have been separated for the last 4 years of this so called 16 marriage. I am very content with my life just me and my 3 children and doing what I want to or don't want too. At this point to get caught up in someone else when I am no where near ready for that. Besides I know enough females that can't live without someone in their life and my motto is learn to live with me first.

That's what I call a Birthday celebration.....

It is great having a birthday so close to the holiday. Even better when you can schedule time off and you end up being off for about a week. Dinner three nights of drinking could it get any better. Well let me tell you it did. The best surprise came on Sunday just when you think maybe you should let something go a whole new ballgame begins. The phone rings and the unexpected since someone was suppose to be out of town for the holiday. My lazy Sunday getting ready for Monday BBQ turned out to be one of the best nights I had in along time. Perfect night of pre 4th fireworks good company conversation and I will just say fireworks have a whole new meaning and will make me smile for years to come. The icing on the cake of a very long party weekend.